Las Vegas sucks! Ok, ok…I began with the conclusion but because there is not much to say about it anyways. So, and sorry Vegas fans and citizens....I will repeat it, Las Vegas sucks!
Why? A lot of reasons. First one to comes into my mind is that it’s not a city. Like Miami (or most of Florida), is a make-believe. A bunch of hotels in the middle of the dessert, a bunch of games and gambling, a lot of cheap stuff and of bad taste (even strippers come cheap and in paper adds), a bunch on shiny things and voila, there’s your campy city. I was there. I know.
But don’t get wrong. I like campy. I love my Almodóvar and my Tarantino and mi Kar Wai Wong as any other campy lover. I love my old James Bond movies, and the over-dramatic voice of Elvis in music (Sandro too, the Argentenean equivalent). That’s the reason why I loved New Orleans. And man how I loved that city!
New Orleans: a mélange. Black. White. The city in the South. The city that was the beginning of the Caribbean, with everything that meant...constant movement, travelers, European merchants, Africans (they were not happy about it and who’s to blame them), languages…..so, New Orleans, a haven of Caribbean with their wood posts, spicy and fishy in their food (I ate ‘gator there for the first-time-ever….not bad, not bad at all), white as Louisiana, Black with its jazz, French, hot, moist.
I went to both cities. The time I went to New Orleans I was fascinated. I saw houses with bad-taste fake cats staring at the window, pink blinds, shiny green balls hanging over the wall. It was so wrong, such a slap in your face, that I loved it! Add that to the food, the river, the music, the people, the weather and the vibe, and you can really enjoy yourself in this city.
So New Orleans is a campy city, but it’s campy in its core. Las Vegas is campy just to sell, there is nothing there you can live without and that is just not there to make a buck. It was founded by a gangster for fucks sake! And in fact, I remember how I wanted to throw up when I saw the imitations of Eiffel, of Egypt, and of my beloved Venice, in these fucking touristy packs for people who think that the rest of the world is a Disney version of it, an Epcot Center.
But I get it, America is all about the show. That’s why people were saying “fuck New Orleans” after Katrina, while Las Vegas was LAS VEGAS, to the point that I have heard people saying it is a great city. I don’t agree, but I do think it should be the capital of the USA. No history, no food, no culture, no taste, no nothing…but a bunch of artificial wows, many lights, much bling-bling, a lot of fake. Isn’t that what “America” is all about? Making a lot of crap to sell out of nothing? Hell, I say, make Las Vegas the fucking capital! It makes way more sense than DC!
Don’t worry, there’s space for all kind of people over the world. So I guess there is enough space for the Las Vegas lovers, and the New Orleans lovers. In fact, it defines your way of perceiving life and your personality. Either you are a big-bang Vegas dude, an all-for-all New Orleans, or you could hate camp all together and hate both cities. They are three sides of the same coin anyways (yes, I said three).
….I will leave the capital for the campy ones in pursuit of games and fun. Meanwhile, I will be at New Orleans any day, were campy is an essence and not a mere thing to buy and bet (you still do though). So, to recapitulate, New Orleans rules, Las Vegas Sucks!
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